Teaching Bears about Contraception? - December 9, 2004 - I just can't help it! I'm sick! I was browsing through the Editorial section of the Bangor Daily News and I noticed that someone had submitted a letter referring to the bear hunt in New Jersey that got canceled this year.

I haven't really followed the issue but that is not the point. What I read was this: New Jersey's supreme court canceled its proposed bear hunt last Thursday ruling that the state needs to establish "a proper management program for bears before it can allow the animals to be hunted."Management in New Jersey would include contraception programs and public education campaigns.

Contraception programs for bears - someone please explain! Free bear condoms? The morning after pill? What????? Are we going to trap the big boys and give them a vasectomy? Just shoot em!!!! And public education campaigns? Where do these bears sign up for free classes. Maybe I'm mistaken! Maybe we are supposed to teach the public how to administer contraceptive devices to a bear. I want to see nurse Jones teaching the proper way of donning a condom to a bear.

This is just way too funny! But I got an idea! Let's appropriate a few million dollars to study the issue some more. I'm for that even though I don't live in New Jersey but being that I am a curious sort of an old geezer, I want to see this "contraception program" in progress - I told you I was sick!